9.12.2004

what the hell, we've got nothing more to lose

found a roommate
pretty interesting kid
found a place
pretty good deal
moving out the 20th?

doppelgangrr is taking shape
an amerikan prayer has a strict concept
peace, love and all that shit is all that shit

a new haircut
somewhat douche-looking
but different at least

for some this will be the end of me
for others it will be a whole new side
and for those unaware
that's what you are


"amerika, a tribute"

a tribute to the brave
to the free
a tribute to the government
to the leaders
a tribute to the parents
to the teachers

this is a tribute for all the things you've done for us

for the rebels of the past
you fought the hardest for them
you gave your lives for them
you did nothing for us

for the rights and constitution
it gave them their freedom
it gave them their dreams
it did nothing for us

for the parental figurines
you tried your best
you gave it your all
you did nothing for us

we don't care about you
we DO NOT care
we hate you because we can
we hate the world because it hates us
we love the end
we hate ourselves
we don't need you
we never needed anything

this is not america
this is not the land of the free
this is not the home of the brave
this is not justice for all
we don't care enough about you to change the world

we're a lost generationand we're never comming back

our home is where the hurt is
our future is dim
our future is grim

our future lies in a grain of sand
being washed away
off of an oil stained beach

you burned up the sun
we inherited the ashes


go here

9.05.2004

i hve arrived and this time you should believe the hype

let's try "normal", shall we?

this would be my last weekend in bend. and it's kida sucked, but whatever, it's allright. yes i have a roommate. haven't found a place yet, but that'll be taken care of this week. haven't found a job either....

i kinda feel like how i felt when i left NY. like this was looooong overdue.

9.04.2004

each thing i show you is a piece of my death

lest we forget
a boy
who fought being a man

and i never wanted
to look in the mirror
and see what i now see

i see death with hair
a boy who won't give in
a peer pressure waiting to happen
someone who used to have something to say

now i don't have anything to say
'cos i don't have anything nice to say.

i hate fucking friends
who don't even know who you are
and i hate being myself
for not knowing who you are.

i give up.
i'm going to hide
and never come out.

this where i divide my life.

leave it or buy it.